A Story of Politics, Shame, Fear and the Search For Unlimited Power

If the title of this episode sounds like someone you might know you are probably right. One of the more overlooked emotions in psychology and the genesis of what might be termed pathological behavior is shame. Shame is a powerful, intensely painful emotion that emerges when indviduals feel that other people, particularly those important to them, hold them in contempt and disgust. Shame is one of the emotions that shapes the moral norms of a society. When we experience intense shame we try and hide, wish we were invisible and could disappear. We tend to escape shame by conforming to the social demands put upon us by fulfilling the roles that define identity. In males shame can play a very powerful role in defining what it means to be a man among other men. (I will leave for another time the role of shame in the development of women.) In our society being a man very often demands success as a sexual being and as a competitor in sports, the economic marketplace or perhaps politics! Difficulties can arise if a child is held as failing social demands to be a successful man and can do nothing to escape from constant shaming. Boys perceived by significant adults as not being smart, athletic, good looking, or successful enough might well grow up to feel intensely ashamed of their very being. Under certain circumstances such children might well spend their lives fearing any judgments or criticisms that would arouse shame and develop personalities geared to avoid shame at any cost. Such individuals might define economic success in which no amount of money is ever enough. It would not be enough to win at sports but these individuals would find it necessary to humiliate opponents. Bullying others, bragging about sexual exploits and shaming others might well be central to their identities. The search for power would be endless and exhausting.