Birth Mother Matter in Adoption Ep. 92: Adoption Match Choice Preferences

Birth Mother Matter in Adoption Ep. 92: Adoption Match Preferences Differences Between Birth Parents and Adoptive Parent

For Adoptive Families

• Adoption Match Preferences
  • Drug use
  • Mental illness
  • Open vs. Closed adoption
  • Communication
• Realistic expectations
• What is disclosed to bms and what is not
• Relationship with bm: during pregnancy and after
• Understanding the internal conflict a bm may have regarding her relationship with aps
• Being able to meet a bm mentally and emotionally where they are
• BMs may change their mind about the hospital plan or level of contact

For Birth Mothers/Fathers

• Education
  • undertsanding what adoption is vs. co-parenting or fostering
  • Open vs. Closed Adoption
  • Communication
• Understanding the mindset of adoptive parents
• Realistic expectations
• What is disclosed to aps and what is not
• Relationship with aps: during pregnancy and after

For Both Sides

• Establishing a relationship takes time, effort and energy
• Trust has to be built
• Every relationship has its ups and downs
• Everyone needs grace
• Attachment is real and goodbyes can be really tough