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Tonight's show will deal with the startlingly military police tactics of police in Albuqurque, New Mexico, as well as the slowly escalating boiling pot of Ukraine, as well as the startling revelation that a distaff member (no pun intended) of the Wu-Tang Clan has chopped off his wiener and tried to die. We will handle these topics with our regular aplomb and grace, as well as the complete opposite of aplomb and grace, which is far more customary. FUN WILL BE HAD.