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What is a Rebound Relationship, and why does it matter?

  • Broadcast in Relationships
JudyGraybill

JudyGraybill

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I recently saw this news story headline: Woman Marries Topless Waiter She Booked for Her Divorce Party.

The article started out,

“A woman fell in love with a topless waiter she hired for her divorce party, and if that's not closure, we're not sure what is..

Not all heroes wear capes; some wear a bow tie and not much else, which was the case for Gabriella Landolfi, who was swept off her feet by a topless waiter she'd hired. ...”

 

This is a prime example of a rebound relationship. I’m not saying that it’s unhealthy. The truth is that I have no idea, since I don’t know this couple personally. However, I can definitively say that it’s not evidence of “closure”.

Closure is about healing the pain from a past relationship. You can be in a new relationship without doing that. In fact, many people do.

The excitement of a new romance makes you feel good. When you’re reeling from the pain of a break-up, that’s when you may be at your lowest point. The compliments and attention of a new person lifts you up and makes you feel good about yourself again. You need that as part of your healing process, but shouldn’t be mistaken as full healing.

Being aware of this distinction can help you maintain a healthy level of attachment, boundaries, and individualism. All are needed to experience a healthy loving relationship.

My question to you is this: What is your end goal? What is that you consider closure? Is the answer to both of those questions another relationship? If so, what is it about another relationship that proves you’ve healed from the last one?

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